While I was exploring the topic of betrayal I realised that all type of betrayals have one root - it begins with breaking promises we made to ourselves.
Whenever we did not act when needed to act; whenever we didn't stand up for ourselves when it was necessary; whenever we kept quiet and agreed with the point of view that we were in total disagreement with.
Betrayal is a slow poison. People take poison to the point when the body becomes toxic and starts to lose balance, and it can't say what is poison or what's not any more.
If we take it too long we can't hear our inner voice of reason any longer.
WHAT DO I REALLY WANT IS buried so deep.
Instead, we go into a fight and flight of quick wins of survivals.
Quick delicious meal, holidays, breaks, sex - lots of tranquillizers are out there to make us feel ok - just temporary.
On this topic I recommend two books:
The Idiot by Russian Classic Fyodor Dostoevsky
Drama Triangle How to Break Free of the Drama Triangle & Victim Consciousness Janae B Weinhold
I think you can get them free at Amazon.
How to train yourself back into keeping promises to yourself:
Using metaphor from a famous tale by Brother's Grimm Golden Goose.
We all are born with golden goose potential. As long as we keep working every day to look after ourselves and create a small change that we want every single day:
- One step at a time - Get one golden egg a day.
Be patient with yourself.
- Cooperate - You never need to do it on your own. Listen to people around you - engage and cooperate as much as possible.
- Ask for help - Ask someone who you trust. A good life coach can help to break from drama triangle.
- Believe in your own golden goose - feed it with what it needs. In other words, look after you. As without you - there is one less golden goose.
- Be committed and be responsive to your needs.
- Let go of pleasing.
I will stop there. LESS IS MORE. That was my golden egg of the moment.
Reach out if you like to explore more on this topic.